I wish to bring to ppl's attention some behaviours and attitudes I have found unfortunate in my brief time on this forum.
When a member has a differing opinion or a different position, the idea of a forum is to *discuss the issue*, *not* make personal attacks or make pejorative comments toward the person with the differing opinion or different position. It also does not mean that the person with the different position is being "disruptive" or "divisive" or is being badly behaved. It just means they have a different opinion.
Discussing the opinion in a non-confrontational and respectful way
is how we *learn*. Telling that member they should "get a life" or any number of rude comments is *not* respectful and is a form of
verbal violence. It is also not a discussion.
If my opinion or position is different to yours, it is not necessary to be defensive. It is not necessary to personally attack. It is not necessary to be sarcastic. It is not necessary to whinge to moderators. If my opinion is different to yours, the best and strongest position to take is to address the comment and *discuss the opinion in a respectful way*.
I avail this respect to you and I do not personally attack you, and I would expect the same regard. The weakest position and most disruptive position to take is to personally attack the member who made that comment and make sarcastic pejorative remarks.
I've been on the receiving end of personal attacks because my position and opinion differs from a select few. I find this very unfortunate and it demonstrates to me weakness and close-mindedness on their part.
If people do not like my opinions, they do not have to read anything I post. If they do not like my position, then they can ignore me. If they disagree with it, they can argue their own position. And if their argument is stronger, ppl will listen to that. They do not need to behave in a puerile disrespectful manner. So I ask for this respect. The same respect I avail those who differ in their opinion. I would also ask that people not make passive aggressive thinly veiled complaints in other threads. It only makes you look weak and whiny.
If you have a problem with me, don't go whinging to moderators because someone differs from your opinion. Talk to me in a respectful manner. If you are not getting enough attention or you need anger management therapy, do the world a favor and solve it off the Internet.
If I offer a differing opinion or position on a thread, that does not make my comment "off topic", it just means I added a different opinion. If this forum is prescriptive and only wants to hear one kind of opinion, then the forum moderators will let me know and I will go elsewhere where people are willing to learn. Better still have that prescription clearly stated in the rules of the forum. As far as I noted, no rule made such a statement. No offense to those here who are willing and open to other opinions on this forum.
Thanks for listening. Peace.
VA
