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What to say???

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claudie claudie TAS Posts: 63
1 9 Jul 2009
My grandparents, who I love dearly, are strongly against vegetarianism, activism and pretty much most thigs I'm passionate about. Whenever I go up there, usually for lunch, they cook up a large roast, complete with a big chunk of pig. They say I'm stupid not to be eating meat and acting so silly. I literally have to bite my tongue to stop myslef from overloading them with the milions of reasons why I'm not eating an animal, becuase I know they'll just reply with a snarky comment (is snarky a word??). Last time we visited I sat there for half an hour (literally) picking off the millions of bits of bacon Granny had scattered over a handmade pizza. I will not chew up a piece of roast pork, then run outside and spit it out where they can't see (not that I have)!! They even remarked that I shouldn't eat the double sponge cake topped with chocoalte becuase she's not sure if she used free range eggs!! I didn't eat it just to prove a point ( and to keep living cruelty free). How can I stay a vegetarian without offending the grandparents??
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Vegan Zombie. Vegan Zombie. SA Posts: 130
2 9 Jul 2009
I have grandparents and other family members that are the same. Although my Aunt is a vegetarian, so they are used to it and aren't quite as vocal as that.

Have you explained to them properly the reasons why you don't eat animals?

If they are really insistent on having such a big problem with it though, there isn't really a great deal that you can do about it... all you can really do is just stand by your beliefs anyway, if they love you then they should accept your choices, even if they don't agree with them.
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ReNe3 ReNe3 VIC Posts: 52
3 9 Jul 2009
Wow, maybe next time you could bring some veggie food of your own or even betta make up a platter or dish to share as a kind of peace offering perhaps?  peace
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RaV3N RaV3N WA Posts: 2152
4 9 Jul 2009
I like Nae Nae's idea. Offer to prepare a side dish.

My grand-parents are aware I am vegetarian... but not vegan (as I wasn't vegan when I saw them last and it's not exactly something you write in a letter.. ps: I'm a vegan!). My Grandma was a little funny about it as her and Grandad owned a sheep farm back in the day. My Nan just commented on some "steak" her son-in-law's vegetarian mum made her once and said how nice it was...

I had to stop getting into a heated debate with my great-aunt though... she seems totally against everything and how "we preach to everyone"... this coming from the biggest christian preacher I have ever known... hypocrite!!!

I just chose to ignore her. Not like I live with her or see her often. But since you see your grandparents often that may be a little harder...

Good luck!
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_Matt _Matt VIC Posts: 1567
5 9 Jul 2009
To be blunt, don't bother not trying to sound rude. I know you love them, and they love you, but really, from what i've read it seems they're being the rude ones - not you.

Just let them know it's your decision, and you hope that they can respect that.

Next time you go, bring something vegetarian with you if it's possible. Also, don't feel like you have to fight for your point - sometimes it really isn't worth the trouble with some people.

good luck happy
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Kirrilly Kirrilly VIC Posts: 2092
6 9 Jul 2009
Matt.Y said:
To be blunt, don't bother not trying to sound rude. I know you love them, and they love you, but really, from what i've read it seems they're being the rude ones - not you.

Just let them know it's your decision, and you hope that they can respect that.

Next time you go, bring something vegetarian with you if it's possible. Also, don't feel like you have to fight for your point - sometimes it really isn't worth the trouble with some people.

good luck happy
I definitely agree.
There's always going to be people you can't reason with in life and sometimes you just have to agree to disagree I suppose.
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ckimana ckimana NSW Posts: 2545
7 10 Jul 2009
There would be no way I would eat the pizza even if the bacon was picked off! Can you start refusing to eat any food with meat in it? Hopefully, if you continue refusing, they might get the idea. As others have said, be prepared and take some veg food for you and enough to share if they want to try it.

If you only eat free range eggs normally, then I wouldn't eat their cake either. But if you don't, then let your grandparents know that a vegetarian can still eat eggs no matter if free range or not. So it's up to you on that one!
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.ellehcoR .ellehcoR VIC Posts: 663
8 10 Jul 2009
I guess you need to understand that your grandparents are from an entirely different era, where factory farms & indoor piggeries were less prevailent, and where there were 'more important things' to consider before regarding the needs of animals.
The problem is that they havn't realised this either.

I dont know you or your family personally, but I guess that you should explain to them that the years have changed, this is now an important issue and you wont tolerate it.

Its odd because back in the 1950s, it was considered outrageous to suggest that women had equal rights to men. Let alone the rights of animals. But now, just over 50 years later, consider the changes. Society is ever evolving, and although most would shrug off the idea of animal rights these days, I have no doubt that one day it will happen. And then on that day people would look back and ask "how could we live in such ignorance?"

So see things from their viewpoint. They believe that 'its not a big deal', so try to make it a big deal. If they are still being ignorant... well, then you can spaz it at them.
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ckimana ckimana NSW Posts: 2545
9 10 Jul 2009
.ellehcoR said:
I guess you need to understand that your grandparents are from an entirely different era, where factory farms & indoor piggeries were less prevailent, and where there were 'more important things' to consider before regarding the needs of animals.
The problem is that they havn't realised this either.

I dont know you or your family personally, but I guess that you should explain to them that the years have changed, this is now an important issue and you wont tolerate it.

Its odd because back in the 1950s, it was considered outrageous to suggest that women had equal rights to men. Let alone the rights of animals. But now, just over 50 years later, consider the changes. Society is ever evolving, and although most would shrug off the idea of animal rights these days, I have no doubt that one day it will happen. And then on that day people would look back and ask "how could we live in such ignorance?"

So see things from their viewpoint. They believe that 'its not a big deal', so try to make it a big deal. If they are still being ignorant... well, then you can spaz it at them.
Well said!  happy
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